Wednesday, December 5, 2007

I Have Been a Bad Girl....

Hey All!

It all started Sunday morning....after a nite of paaartying with the girls (2 margaritas, 1 long island iced tea, and I vaguely remember some chicken wings) (and no I did not drive home! Thanks for the ride Teresa!) I woke up Sunday morning famished! I decided not to go the buffet route, but rather to get something small but tasty and filling.

So what did my dumb ass do? WENT TO PANERA'S!! For those of you who are not familiar with this slice of heaven, Panera's is a low carb lovers nightmare! Bread, bread and more bread! They even have, I kid you not, a croissant with a chocolate bar in it!

So anyhoo, I walk (or float) in the door, and the carbs are a'callin! "Welcome back Tracy, we missed you!! Ooooh , you look so thin, you must be sick, let us help you!" I swear, on top of the fresh bread, the homemade bagels, they had every kind of pastry known to man...

But I was determined not to fall, so I ordered a spinach-artichoke egg souffle! Cute little thing, all wrapped up in a gold foil tin. I get my order, sit down to inhale it, and GASP! I have half of it in my mouth before I realize that the damn thing is baked in PASTRY! I have never been so pissed and so happy at the same time! It was great!

Well, that was it! Took my butt back up to the counter and got me an apple danish and a pumpkin spice latte and I have been on a downward slide ever since!

Got on the scale today - 228! That is almost 10 pounds!! AAAAA!! So gotta get back on track, but it is hard. I have been exercising, but not at the same pace as I was. Today was a clear nite but a little cold. I could've wrapped up and braved it but I did a paltry 1/2 hour on the stair stepper instead!

I don't wanna undo all of my hard work! I dont wanna start gaining and growing out of my new clothes! But right now, I can't seem to say no to what I know is bad for me. I read and re-read Nona's posts, but I can't figure out what is triggering me to keep abusing myself! I thought I was pretty happy - maybe I'm just greedy! Don't know but tomorrow is another day to start over. We have a exercise bike at work - I am packing my workout clothes and shoes and getting on it!! And if I "forget" my stuff, I am going to Walmart and buy me some stuff!

Can't stop now, I've come so far!!

I can do it!!

Til next time, hopefully I'll have better news!


Nona said...

Maybe it is the time of the year. :( So sorry you are struggling. It happens though. Accept that and put it behing you.

Call in all your resources to get yourself out of the downward slide. You HAVE been doing well and you will do well again.

Take a deep breath and jump back into your routine with gusto. I will be doing the same on my end.


Lordgreenrose said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Feliz said...

Please don't beat yourself up...I've been watching (and reading) and admiring your progress and zest... you'll be fine...

I think if you restrict yourself too much, that in itself may push you to eat more of the less than healthy things...believe me I KNOW.

I agree with Nona...put it behind you and keep focus on all the good you've done.

Tracy said...

Thank you both, tho right now I have managed to jump into some Christmas cookies with gusto....Damn clients! Have kept up the exercise tho!

On with the struggle!