Compulsive Eater and Sugar Addict

A long time ago I came to the realisation that I was a sugar addict and compulsive overeater. This realisation did not come overnight. It took years to understand myself and my relationship with food.

I was a pretty normal eater and average sized kid up until the age of 8, but around 8 I developed an abnormal and unconscious relationship with food. Abnormal because I used food particularly sugary foods not just to fuel my body’s functions but to comfort, nurture and protect myself. Unconscious because for a long time I didn’t understand that that was what I was doing.

I have lived in Barbados, France, the USA and Britain and though these are very different societies in many ways, two of the things they have in common regarding obesity is their lack of understanding of many of the psycho-social issues that create obesity and their assumption that overweight or obese people are simply greedy, lack willpower, don’t care about ourselves, have not pride, are lazy, stupid etc. and therefore can be ridiculed subtly or overtly and generally discriminated against.

I’m not a doctor, dietician, psychiatrist or psychologist and I don’t pretend to know everything about obesity. What I do know from my own experience however, is that obesity is a symptom and the most successful way to treat it is to identify and address its root cause(s).

Thanks to Sweet Potato Pie for affording me a space for this weekly post sharing my history as a compulsive eater and sugar addict, and my journey to living a healthier life.

Happy dance, y'all!

225.6!!!!!

Hello Lovely People!!

Gotta run to another hiking expedition, so this will be short....Weighed in Friday at 227.6 for a contest loss of 7.9 pounds for the month - yay!

Wanted to keep the momentum going, so I tried faster walking/slow jogging for a few blocks of my nightly walk.

Got on the scale this morning, and danced all thru the house!! 19.2 lbs. lost so far!!! Maybe I will make my goal after all!

Talk at ya later!!

OH! And a big welcome to Nona from England! Can't wait to hear from the other side of the pond!

Welcome a New Blogger

Hi All,

A new Blogger has joined the Nona. She hearkens from England and has a blog of her own 55kg that chronicles her journey to get back to her goal weight of 55kg (That's about 120 pounds for the metric unit challenged folk. lol).

Let's give her a big Sweet Potato Pie welcome. And I look forward to her first post.

Setting Weight Loss Goals

A while back Tracy talked about setting goals if you're serious about losing weight. Well, I agreed whole heartedly....and then didn't do anything about it. Namely setting my own goals. Conventional wisdom tells us that those people who set and implement their goals are the most successful at whatever it is they are trying to accomplish. It's a way of holding yourself accountable and gives you a visual representation of where you are and where you need to be.

I NEVER set goals. At least not enough to take the time to write them down and say, "Okay. This is what I want to do and this is how I plan on getting there." And maybe that's why I never (or rarely) end up where I want to be in the time I want to be there in.

Well, today is a new day. And I'm no longer waiting.

My Weight Loss Plan

Current Weight: 161 pounds (Publix scale. It doesn't lie)

Goal: To be 140 pounds

Start Date: Already Started

End Date: By December 31. Trying to look good for that New Years Bash! And for a lifetime. This time I'm keeping it off!

How: A combination of diet and exercise mainly focusing on fiber intake and ratcheting up the cardio via wogging, stair master, walking on treadmill and soon dancing.

Plan: I don't do well with diets. I've got authority issues and don't like being told what to do even if it's passively from a diet book. But I recognize that I HAVE to change my eating habits and adjust my workouts for my body type if I'm going to succeed. And as I've mentioned before, I like ice cream too much and most diets don't allow it.

So because of my ice cream desires and my authority issues I've decided to focus on something that I can do....and that's focus on my fiber intake. Americans get about 7 - 15 grams of fiber a day and if you're a woman you need about 25 - 30 grams of fiber to keep the system moving.

Studies have also shown that eating fiber keeps the weight off AND helps you to lose the weight. I figure if I focus on my fiber intake then the rest will take care of itself. 80% of weight loss is diet anyways.

As far as exercise goes I have generally been good about that but I have to tailor my work outs to my body type (more on that later) and that's been my big issue.


So that's it. My Great Weight Loss Plan. I'll update weekly with weekly weigh ins, food diaries and dress size changes. If I'm encouraging everyone else to get on the ride then I need to make sure I'm hopping on the ride as well. And a weigh we go!

Today is a new day. What are you waiting for?

If nothing that I have said so far has persuaded you....

Where the hell are we?

The Gang! Ken, Me, Michele, Cynthia, and Little Lizzie!

...to change your lifestyle and get healthy and fit.....please read on!!

Hi All!

I have been really happy lately, just really, really happy. Dunno if it is the exercise or the vitamins or what, but I have just been elated. OH!! I know why! It happened last Friday....

I was getting some lunch. It had been a long week and I decided that I would treat myself to some pizza - crustless of course! (God, I love this diet!!) So I placed my order and sat on a bench in the foyer to wait.

Now, let me set the scene for you. Here I was, little ol me, in my cute Jones New York slinky top, my boot cut slim pants, and my brand new wig (yes I unapologetically wear wigs! You got a problem with that, you are more than welcome to come over and do my hair every morning!)

In short, I was looking F - I - N - E fine! To me anyways....Anyhoo, there was this guy in the buffet line probably 30 feet from me. Tall, cowboy lookin guy, wavy hair, nice butt - and he kept looking over at me! ME! It was like, get some pizza, look at me, get some salad, look at me, get some cheesy bread, you get the idea....

Now I am a stickler for eye contact and smiling and saying 'hello'. I don't trust anyone that cannot return your gaze, especially when speaking to you. When you are a big girl tho, eye contact from another male can be rare. Sometimes you get the quick look away, or the look over your head thing, or the look scared and run in the other direction. Ladies, any man that would do any of these things is not worth the precious breath that you are wasting on them.......MOOOVE OOON!

Oh, back to the story...so anyway, dude was looking at me, and I smiled and said "Hi! How are ya?" and dude KEPT EYE CONTACT, KEPT SMILING and said "Good, how are you?"

I said "Fine" and he said, get this, he said "Yes ya are"! Just like that, country twang and all!

Then he went and probably joined his wife for lunch......but that one moment made me feel so wonderful!!!

And it happened a couple more times this weekend! Eye contact, little conversation, no ones running away.......Dang, I must be getting good looking!

Every one says that they can see the loss in my face....which I thought was a nice way of saying "....but your butt is still massive..." but..I am starting to see and feel different, better, more energetic. Every morning is like Christmas....wait, barf, change that.....Every morning is exciting because of the subtle changes that I am going thru.

Weigh in is this Friday and so far I am at 228. I am a qualified size 20 and an and 18 in elastic.

My body and the scale are doing two opposite things, so I have come to a decision. The first weigh in showed our team with a total loss of 37 pounds. The number one team had a loss of 90 pounds. So I don't think that we are going to win this one. But my team is not giving up the fight for fitness!

In my obsessive battle with the scale, and because of a slight injury, I decided to drop the weight training, thinking it was the training that was keeping my weight from dropping. (Sorry, Grant)

Well, I am starting weights up again, along with my powerwalking and my new sport, hiking. In the end, its only numbers on a scale. And those numbers are the only thing blocking the total picture - my health. So, no more jumping on the scale until it says what I think it should say, no more fretting over hormonal/water retention bouts, no more weighing up to 10 times a day!

I will continue my diet and exercise plan, and let my body do it's thing the way it wants to. Make Peace and Mooooove On!!

Well gotta get some of my fabby new clothes out for work tomorrow! Life is really fun!! Oh, and the pics are of a hiking trip that my team went on a couple weeks ago - four miles in the woods! We had a great time!!

Til next time.....YOU CAN DO IT!

Socio-economic Reasons Behind Obesity and Responses From Readers

Alternet.org has an interesting take on the obesity epidemic in the U.S. They look at it from a genetic, body image, socio-economic and class perspective. While I don't know if I agree with the body image take and study after study has shown that genetics play a limited role in obesity/overweight issues, the socio-economic/class issues really hit home.

Just from personal experience it can be very expensive to eat healthily. If you're poor or on a fixed income you just don't have the money to shop at Whole Foods. And fresh fruits and vegetables as well as lean meats are EXPENSIVE. Here is a bit of the article:

It's not as if we don't have the evidence that these factors -- culture, class, education, genetics -- matter. Yet another study just came out by University of Washington researchers who found gaping disparities in obesity rates among ZIP codes in the Seattle area. Every $100,000 in median home value for a ZIP code corresponded with a 2 percent drop in obesity.

Adam Drewnowski, director of the UW Center for Obesity Research, told the Seattle Post-Intelligencer,"If you have this mind-set that obesity has to do with the individual alone, then ZIP codes or areas really should not come into this. But they do, big-time."

This is not to say that individual behavior doesn't play a vital role in our country's obesity rate, but we too often neglect to think about the cultural and institutional influences on a person's behavior when it comes to eating and exercise.

You would never look at a working class, single mother driving a jalopy with three kids crawling around in the back and say, "Gees, what's her problem? Why can't she drive the Lexus hybrid like me?" You understand that she doesn't have the means, and furthermore, probably doesn't have the peer influence that would make it seem like a viable option.

In the comments section of the article a working mom comments about the class aspect of weight loss and healthy eating:

Most interesting, this article. I am a working-class single mother
who, until very recently, worked two jobs, six days a week, and
could only squeeze in one weekend afternoon (after work) a
swim at my local "Y". I worked out for three years, and made
much progress on my physique, but also note that without a
car, I was not able to work out more often.
Two years ago, I was suddenly diagnosed with Stage IV breast cancer, had to move to a smaller residence (where I now live
alone, my kids are now grown), and cope with my new illness
as best as I could living on S.S.I.
What I've discovered that compared to my previous working life, I now had time to focus on physical health, learn to be
able to pamper myself, and eat healthier than I used to.
What I've also discovered is it takes a lot of work to eat
healthier, as I've noted, you can't keep a head of lettuce
(or any produce, for that matter) for a week in your fridge.
In order to be able to just keep up a regimen of healthy eating, you have to shop several times a week to keep
fresh fruits and vegetables available for most every meal.
There is no way on God's earth with the kind of grueling
schedule I used to keep that I could have the luxury of
sashaying off to my local health food produce store to
keep fresh food on hand as I can now that I no longer am
working.

Other readers make an excellent point that the article actually misses and that's the role of Big Food, Big Agriculture and Big Government play in the obesity issues that face the US:

However, what is missing here is some discussion of the effects of industrial farming practices on the nutritional content/value of the food we buy and eat every day. And the preservation of the integrity of the soil. [This is not the place for organics-fans, vegetarians and vegans to insert a statement of how clever they are to buy organic: this problem is much bigger than your adorable little consumer habits. Call me hostile, but it would be a real break if the solipsists could just peek above their personal horizons for a brief moment to look at the bigger picture.]

We cannot continue to extract our food by the brutal forces we apply in crop farming, animal farming, food marketing, artificial this and Bt that, terminator seeds a third, and still expect to preserve the integrity of our food and our environment. It's gradually becoming clearer to the brighter lights among us that despite the vast amounts of food consumed by many here in the West, that people are actually still hungry, that no amount of this nutritionally empty industrially produced food laced with hunger-generating hormones will satisfy.

And another

...check out the labels on some common foods and condiments (ketchup, worcestershire sauce, etc.). these days it is difficult to find a prepared food that does not include the ingredient "high fructose corn syrup". this is not a naturally occurring additive - it is highly processed and has no nutritional value. in fact, it is very likely a health hazard. even bread products now have this as one of the main ingredients. i challenge you to look at the list of ingredients next time you go to buy bread. asking people to give up carbohydrates entirely is absurd, but even food that is not considered "carb" contains this ingredient. it is entirely for the profit of the manufacturers that this is in our diet, and its inclusion probably contributes to the problem of weight with which many of us struggle. obesity in america has many underlying causes. let's not forget that seemingly innocent foods can be as much a part of that as the trend over the past several years to make servings at restaurants and take-away food merchants enormous. some responsibility has to be laid at the feet of the purveyors.

I think what the article and the comments show is that the obesity issue in this country is no where near as simple as "Just take personal responsibility for your behavior and choices." While that is a part of it there are also a lot of entities working to make SURE you overeat. I think you have to look at the whole picture and understand ALL the FACTORS involved regarding weight and food in America to best devise a strategy to lose the weight and live a healthier life.

To read the rest of How to Address Obesity in a Fat-Phobic Society click on the link in the sidebar under "Articles." Be sure to read the comments as well.

A Word for Us Diabetics....

Me, Before

Hi All!!

Tonite, I am tired!! Good tired, but tired nonetheless! I weigh in next week and so far I have lost 5 pounds! Woo Hoo but I want five more off!! So, I have gone back to walking on my lunch hour and again in the evening, along with weight training. I think I overdid it, cuz tonite I am sore. Soooooo.....I'm going to listen to my body tonite and rest up a bit. I wanted a chance to catch up with y'all anyways!


Got some really good news from my doctor last week! As you all know, I have Diabetes that I control by my diet and pills. My type of Diabetes has less to do with the pancreas and insulin and more to do with the sugar my body takes in not tranferring from the cells to the muscles.

Now, I have one of those in- your -face doctors. I honestly think that he is a fat-a-phobic because everything that is wrong with me is because "You're Fat". Not overweight, not carrying a bit too much weight, but "fat". According to Dr. Sensitive, if I would stop drinking the soda, stop eating all the sugar and breads and donuts etc., and FOR GOD'S SAKE get some exercise, I wouldn't have :

Constantly blurred vision
Fatigue
Yeast Infections
Blotches (they are called Diabetics rash and form on your neck and back)
An urgent need to go to the bathroom at least twice in the night

And.....if I took care of myself now I could completely avoid:

Blindness
Kidney Problems
Problems with Circulation
Heart Attack and Stroke
Premature Death

For two years, I laughed at this man and did not take him seriously, because I did not feel that bad. And for two years he kept on telling me that it is only going to get worse, but keep on because my insurance company pays him whether I listen to him or not. Charming and blunt!


Well, I hit 40 and the bottom fell out! Suddenly, I started needing my "reading glasses" more and more, and I felt tired all the time. After a nite of eating and drinking the wrong stuff, my eyes would be bloodshot red, and I had a constant yeast infection. And worst of all, I was getting so big!! I couldn't pull off "thick" anymore. I was deep in "fat-assed" territory. (see pic)
(don't laugh!) (ok, you can laff just a little). And worse than that, the only man that was even remotely attracted to me was the dishwasher at Bob Evans!! The one with the brown teeth! Eww. At that moment, I decided that I needed to do something about the situation.

So anyhoo, I went back to my doctor, and told him that I would like to try the Atkin's diet since it would cut down on my sugar and carb intake. If the man could have kissed me, he would have.....

Since I started the diet in August, Dr. Killjoy has been monitoring my blood sugar, cholesterol etc. We also have been adjusting the dosage of medicine that I take. Now for those of you that don't have the big D, I will explain blood sugar levels. When your body is functioning as it should, your blood sugar levels should be around 85-110. When I was diagnosed with Diabetes, my level was at 502. And for two years I fluctuated between 190-300. Oh, I could get it down to 110 by not eating for a couple of days, but when I was "safe" again, it was back to the soda and candy. This is the phase in my life that I call "Being a Stupid Ass". My doctor agrees with this (of course).



Well, I am happy to report that since I have been on my diet and exercise regimen, my blood sugar has not gone over 112...that is almost normal. I have lost over 14 pounds, and three dress sizes. My eyesight is loads better, yeast is gone, and I sleep thru the nite! I have a ways to go before I get the total stamp of approval from Doc. Tellitlikeitis, but even he is kinda sorta happy.

Ladies, I realized finally that this was not going to get any better and decided to make a change for the better...... before I had a stroke or heart attack or my kidney's failed. Don't let your love for cake and soda put you in an early grave. I have only been doing this for a short period of time, and while I hurt tonite, the rewards are outweighing the inconveniences.

Diabetes is a silent killer - by the time you start showing symptoms of being sick, the damage has been done. Nothing is worth your health or the precious time that you have on this earth!
So, you have this disease, please take care of yourself....YOU CAN DO IT!!

Cya

Tracy